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Please welcome to the ever-bloodier Streaming Wars: Paramount+.
Before you go on an inner-monologue rant about “these new goddamned streaming TV thingies popping up all the goddamned time,” know that Paramount+ (yeah, another +) isn’t “new.” It’s just 7-year-old CBS All Access with a new paint job, so goddamn relax.
The CBS All Access name did the service no favors. It sounded like Boomer backwash aimed at the 60-to-Dead demographic looking to binge the entire NCIS franchise before ascending to that great “Whites Only” diner in the sky. Paramount+? It’s sleek! It’s hip! It’s now!
It’s also way more inclusive, with
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