Tyler James - Page 7

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BREAKING: Portland Resident Offended by This Headline and Also the Word ‘Resident’

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Share This ArticlePORTLAND, OR — Chaos erupted in a local community Slack channel today after a Portland man reportedly became deeply offended...

UnitedHealthcare Announces Bold New Plan To Cover Nothing

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Share This ArticleMINNETONKA, MN — In a daring move sure to disrupt the healthcare industry, UnitedHealthcare unveiled its most ambitious policy overhaul...

Heavenly Gates Swing Open After Val Kilmer Whispers “I’m Your Huckleberry” to the Intercom

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Share This ArticleIn a moment theologians are already calling “the chillest entrance into the afterlife on record,” actor Val Kilmer ascended to...

Middle-Aged Man Confident He ‘Still Got It’ While Mouthing Entire Limp Bizkit Verse at Red Light

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Share This ArticleSPRINGFIELD, OR — Sources confirmed Wednesday that 43-year-old Tyler Blevins, divorced father of three and assistant manager at the Eugene...

Experts Agree: ‘The NeverEnding Story’ Is The Ultimate Emotional Reset Button

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Share This ArticleU.S. — After decades of research, burnout, and failed coping strategies involving expensive apps and oat milk lattes, mental health...

Tina Kotek Gets a Head Start on Earth Day by Buying a Tesla, Looks to Explain on Joe Rogan’s Show

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Share This ArticleSALEM, OR — Oregon Governor Tina Kotek is shaking things up this week with a move that has left some...

Oregon State Scientists Baffled as Willamette River Births New Glow-in-the-Dark Creature

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Share This ArticleWILLAMETTE VALLEY, OR — In a groundbreaking yet deeply unsettling discovery, scientists at Oregon State University have confirmed the spontaneous...

Oregon Man’s Depression Downgraded from “Crippling” to “Moody” After Full Day of Sunshine

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Share This ArticleCreswell, OR — In what mental health experts are calling “a minor miracle” and “the emotional equivalent of unclenching your...

Portland Family Says Final Goodbyes to Dad Who Bravely Drank From Benson Bubbler

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Share This ArticlePORTLAND, OR — A local family is in mourning after 44-year-old Ron Breckman tragically passed away this week following what...

Report: Someone Needs to Quiet That Sniveling Brat Immediately

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Share This ArticleSALEM, OR — A routine grocery run at the WinCo Foods off Commercial Street in Salem turned into a full-blown...
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